It gets to be quite a show to watch them try to undress, shower and dress in a men's locker room without being seen naked by any of the other men and boys in the locker room. Its really funny that it never occurs to these guys that they call much more attention to themselves trying to slide off a pair of sweaty workout shorts while wrapped in a towel than they would attract if they just pulled off the shorts and then put the towel around them to walk to the shower.
Could it be that this phobia is the result of too many boys being raised by their mothers absent the influence of a father.
I grew up knowing full well that my, my brother's and my father's body was very different from my mother's body. Natural was natural.
I have never had the opportunity to talk to a younger guy about the reasons for this extreme modesty over nakedness in a place where nakedness should supposedly the norm. Are they ashamed of their own body or have modern day kids been warned so much about the possibility of encountering a pervert that they are afraid to show their naked body?
It seems the foolishness over nudity is a fairly recent phenomenon. Guys 40 and over whom I see at the gym have no qualms at all about nudity. Some even come out of the shower naked and stand at the sinks naked while they shave. It seems to be mostly the young guys in their late 20's and below that can't bear to be seen naked.
I sure hope they are not in the same mode when they have sexual encounters. Sure would take a lot of fun out of it.
Being a bisexual man, I appreciate both the male and the female form. It's a shame that so many young guys are so uptight about their own bodies.
Jack Scott
Jack. Like you, when I was very small, my mom would take me into the shower and took baths with my dad. True with my sister as well. My parents were not particularly libertines, in fact a little on the prudish side, but I never have felt much shame for nudity.
ReplyDeleteI do remember, being a pre-teen and a teenager, and seeing other boys who were afraid to be seen naked. When I was at Boy Scout camp, I was the ONLY one in my troop who actually showered nude. The only exception I remember to this was being in Jr. High and our Gym coach insisted we showered naked (because it would be silly to do otherwise).
You're absolutely right. The effort it takes to conceal genitalia is astonishingly silly. It seems more normal to just change like a normal person would.
I never thought about it much as a kid. I showered nude at camp, beach showers, etc. I remembered being worried about throwing wood, but not about being seen naked.
ReplyDeleteA few years ago, I started going to the gym. For some strange reason I can't explain, I went out of my way to cover up. I guess I was self conscious about the extra weight I was carrying. Anyways, there were a lot of guys my age and older that just didn't care. But, I noticed a couple of guys struggle to keep their towel on while putting on their underwear, and I just had to laugh (to myself). I realized the ridiculousness of it, and gave up my own bashful ways.
Jack - you have captured well the paradox of the younger generation of men. The polls tell us they are more accepting of gays and lesbians, and more of them even admit having some sex with guy buddies. They are also as young men much more body obsessed, and pay lots of attention to it, from buffing up regularly to shaving their privates (convinced girls like a well groomed cock and balls to play with).
ReplyDeleteYet they do not want other guys to see them naked - maybe they don't want to be cruised, maybe they don't want other guys to see how much they have groomed. I do see them doing that whole under-the-towell thing out in the open by the college swimming pool - where that act is actually kind of a turn on to watching girls I suspect.
Have talked to architects who design junior high and high schools - kids do not want to shower after PE so they are not putting group showers in brand new schools!!! In redoing our university locker rooms, the former gang shower was converted to dozens of individual showers with private doors after student surveys showed this was the strong preference!!
I guess the days of nude swimming at YMCA camp which felt so healthy at the time (and later presented some visual fun) are over.
the world's gone mad. i'm a rugger. we like to get nekid. we don't need an excuse. we get nekid in the locker room, on the pitch, at parties after matches w/ wives and girlfriends present. i'm not sure why things have changed but i must admit, i think jaysonstreet is on to something. guys today primp and preen like nobody's business. they groom and shave their private parts. UGH! maybe they secretly realize how ridiculous they look. maybe that's what they're trying to hide. i'm kidding of course. i say go nekid and go proud. fuck em.
ReplyDeletecheers!
In 1967, I was a freshman in high school. It was the first time we were required to make use of the showers and locker room at school. Although we were a bit apprehensive about it, we did it and thought nothing of it. For me, it quickly became a guilty, secret pleasure of mine, always hoping to sneak a peek at the hotties, or perhaps the grand jackpot--one of the gym teachers.
ReplyDeleteYears later, I was talking with a friend whose daughter was in middle school. Somehow he brought up the fact that his wife had to pick her up at lunch break on certain days so that she could shower. ???
He went on to explain that she's too hot and sweaty after gym class, so his wife goes to the school and signs her out at lunch break so that she can come home and shower.
WHAT??? He continued to explain that for quite some time, it was decided to be unconstitutional to force a child to be nude in front of anyone. As a result, the showers in public schools are totally optional and in turn, no one uses them. I felt like such a dinosaur!
And so now, you have the result. We have young adults who are embarrassed and inhibited in a locker room situation, and we have parents who are also paranoid about their little Horton or Desdemona being eyed up by some pervert. They go on to explain that, "It's totally different today, with all the child molesters and the internet! One can't be too careful..", etc, etc, etc.
I understand the concern, and yes, we all need to teach kids to be careful. But the truth is, IT'S NOT NEW! THEY'VE ALWAYS BEEN OUT THERE! It's just that people talk about it now. Years ago--they didn't!
The world HAS gone mad, as rugby sex said. As a result, I refuse to be alone with kids in any kind of public/family/friends environment. There's always someone in the group who feels that their kid was being eyed up the evil gay guy--after all, that's what they do.
Please! I'm gay, and I have no attraction to anyone under 40, just for the record.
I soo agree with you Bob that today its a scary thing to even look at someone in fear of being charged with something and when your NOT into young boys that its even scaryer what the parents think and do
DeleteI garduated from HS in '58 it was common that we took showers after gym no one absolutely no covered up, and we swam nude at the Y, girls had to wear some ugly swim suits but the boys all nude ( separated by sex) got my best desires fulfilled in those years, probably helped me keep my bi desires alive and well. On some occasions I was spotted staring, I can not figure out how I managed to escape being called a fagot buy glad I did. In those days it would have been VERY bad news.
ReplyDeletePJ2
Most young guys are afraid that they will be seen to have a "small" cock, but thet are equally afraid of having a boner or even a semi, perhaps that is why they try to undress without showing their cock.
ReplyDeleteI often have wondered why I am perfectly at ease being nude around other men but if there is the slightest chance a woman or youngster might be in the vicinity, I must be covered. In Europe nudity doesn't seem to be an issue at beaches but our puritanical ways persist even though our population has long been gone from the original Puritans. Sometimes my own attitudes surprise me. Johnny
ReplyDeleteI actually think it is a good thing to be surprised by ourselves once in a while. It shows that we are growing and branching out.
DeleteThe facts are, God or nature, whichever one prefers to believe made us naked. It is a completely natural state. Society has fostered the hangups.
Appreciate your insights.
Jack Scott
not only have i noticed it, but i did some web searches on it......btw, i'm 49 and don't really care, being nude is fine with me-i don't go to the gym to look or be looked at, but i am not drying off with underwear already on! i'll dry my nude body first, then i'll put on clothes....but there are several websites with guys bitchin about us guys over 40 being exhibitionists, being too fat to being "showing off" our bodies, standing "captain morgan" and "flaunting" our penises..... i was shocked at the level of anger about something as normal as being nude in a locker room? i'm not exhibiting or flaunting-i'm simply showering, drying off, shaving, etc., all the normal things you do in a locker room, a lot of which requires you to disrobe.....i'm certainly not showing anything off...damn, it's often chilly in there, which means, i aint really in show off mode cause i suffer badly from cold air shrinkage.... my main question for them is "why are you looking?"
ReplyDeleterates of circumcision interest me.... like actually how many are and how many aren't.....alright.... i do see many guys, mostly older that will go nude in the locker room without silly moves to cover up...some like me, they'll walk nude right out of the showers back to the lockers to get their towel.....i hardly ever know who is cut and who is uncut.......gee, dude, i don't look! yeah, i might see a little out the corner of my eye, but i keep my eyes from making a direct line of vision to it....not that i'm scared of seeing a cock, it just seems natural to not look at genitals in a public setting....and no one looks at mine that i ever noticed, and if they do take a quick peek when i don't notice, i don't care...as long as he doesn't stare, try to touch me, or start touching himself.
In the 1970s I swam naked in a US Univerisity pool; nudity was mandatory, and nude showers before and after swimmming were mandatory too.All guys were had cut cockes, and I, coming from a South American country, am uncut as all are over here.When I retracted my foreskin to soap my glans, almost everyone looked at me;they did not know how this worked.I had once to give a demostration I ended having a boner.Everuone laughed, but it was not a gay thing
DeleteI totally agree! It's totally hilarious seeing young men putting on underwear under the towel around their waist. I personally don't care. I strip, go to the shower, dry off all buck naked. I am older, in shape, average, but frankly I don't care who sees me. When I was in high school and college it was the opposite. You would be thought odd or strange if you did what these young men are going through in the locker room. And, aside from friends, these guys don't really even talk to each other. Scared? Ashamed? I think being naked is liberating. There was a Men's Y that all of us swam naked. Now that would be totally taboo. Swimming was easier without swim trunks. Anyone agree with me?
ReplyDeleteThis is a fascinating discussion, and I do think you're onto something with the father influence reasoning - I myself didn't have much of a father figure in my life, and having to figure out everything sexual and body-wise on my own came with a great deal of modesty and shame. Luckily, I feel like in my early twenties, I'm past it - but I do think that nudity among men is a liberating and helpful experience for everyone involved!
ReplyDeleteBTW, I love your blog - you got yourself a new follower! :)
It's the greatest manifestation of homophobia ever (affecting an entire generation of young men). It's not that they are fearful of homosexuals themselves. To the contrary, most of them are very accepting and many even vocally supportive of a variety of lifestyles and family structures. They support this diversity but don't wish it for themselves.
ReplyDeleteTheir locker room behavior they exhibit is based on this duality of public tolerance but personal aversion. Why this personal aversion and why does it manifest in this locker room behavior? It is a scarcely documented but widely understood fact, a fact well known among males in this generation (the ONE that EVERYONE paid attention in health class): if the penis (or any portion thereof) of a young heterosexual is observed by any homosexual (age matters nmot) then that heterosexual male will be transformed at some point later in their life. (Sometimes the change is instantaneous, but rarely is that the case.) Now, I know many of you who read this blog are gay and possibly object to what I'm saying and would assert that it just isn't true. Okay, but you're gay already. How you know that isn't what happened to you. Do you have a gay uncle or lesbian aunt who changed your diaper when you were an infant. I could have even been one of them.
In any event, don't shoot the messenger. You wanted to know. That is exactly why.