Friday, August 17, 2012

So You Want To Hear From Someone With Credential Huh?

Helping married guys with their homosexuality or their bisexuality started out as an avocation for me. It sprang from my own struggles with self-hatred and despair over my own sexuality.

I'm sure it seems crazy to some of  you but in the early years of my adulthood I didn't even know what I was. I knew I wasn't "normal" in sexual terms as compared to other guys. I knew I was attracted to certain types of males and I knew I had sexual dreams about males.

At the same time though I knew I absolutely loved straight sex and I knew I could never get enough of it. What did that make me other that queer? Or weird? Or crazy? Or damned?

In those days there was no internet to turn to for information. In the small town I lived in there wasn't even a library to turn to because the librarian had known me most of my life. Over almost 30 years I worked out my own redemption. It was a long difficult journey. As the song says, "I Wouldn't Take Nothin for My Journey Now," but at the time the journey almost killed me.

But the school of hard knocks has a long record of esteemed graduates. It also has a longer list of those who failed to make the cut. Many don't graduate, but those that do are generally recognized experts in their field of study.

It was from this perspective that I began my avocation of helping guys cope with sexual desires and drives they did not understand. Early successes must have been more the result of a benevolent God that me; but nevertheless, there were successes. That spurred me on.

After I retired from my career, what had been a mere avocation began to demand more and more of my time and energy. That was a good thing. It kept me busy and it kept my mind off my own health problems.

But on a fairly regular basis I come into contact with guys who want credentials other than those offered by the school of hard knocks.

Fortunately those credentials are fairly easy to supply. The following is a case in point:

Jay Michaelson is a writer, scholar and activist whose work addresses the intersections of religion, sexuality, spirituality and law. He is the author of "God vs. Gay? The Religious Case for Equality," available on from Beacon Press.

Jay is is the author of three other books and more than 200 articles, essays, and works of fiction. He is the Associate Editor of Religion Dispatches, a Contributing Editor to the Forward newspaper, and Founding Editor of Zeek magazine. His work on behalf of sexual minorities in religious communities has been featured in the New York Times, CNN and NPR, as well as several anthologies.

Jay has held teaching positions at Boston University Law School, City College of New York and Yale University. He holds a J.D. from Yale Law School, an M.A. in Religious Studies from Hebrew University, an M.F.A. in writing from Sarah Lawrence College, and a B.A. magna cum laude from Columbia, and is completing his Ph.D. at Hebrew University of Jerusalem. He has been a scholar-in-residence at dozens of universities, synagogues and other institutions.

In 2009, Jay was included on the “Forward 50″ list of “the men and women who are leading the American Jewish community into the 21st century,” and in June, 2010, he won the New York Society for Professional Journalists “Deadline Club” award for opinion writing.

This man has credentials on his credentials commonly known as credentials out the wazoo! For more information on Jay see the web site at

Don't get me wrong. I hope you'll read my blog regularly, but if you need supporting references this guy can provide them.

The fact of the matter is that if you are reading this blog you are more than likely a married homosexual or bisexual man or married to one. The other facts that go along with that is you sexuality is not going to change and more than likely you are not going to be able to ignore it. You're going to have to deal with it in some manner.

Doing that is not going to be pleasant, easy or free of feelings of guilt. But it is necessary and you might as well have help. Help is available in many places. Reach out and grad some. You'll be a better man for it. You'll also be a happier man and a healthier man.

Jack Scott

1 comment:

  1. Jack - I have read the book you reference – “God vs. Gay” – the book is very thought provoking. The author outlines the case FOR same sex relationships from a purely Biblical perspective. There is no politics – Right vs. Left – Republican vs. Democrat, etc. in the book Not sure that I have totally believe everything that he says, but it has caused me to adjust my thinking some and has generated a number of discussions with in my gay group of friends. Book is worth reading if one is trying to reconcile being gay with religion.


I deeply regret that I must reinstate the verification process for those who want to leave comments on my blog. This is due to the intolerable amount of spam that spammers are attempting to leave on the blog.

At the same time I am changing settings so that those of you who have a Google Blogger ID or other recognized blogger ID will not have to have your comments moderated. My hope is this will encourage more readers to take the time to comment. The fact is I want to read comments with those of you who disagree with me as well as those of you who agree with me. All I ask is that you keep your comments clean and non-threatening.

The only reason I take the time to write this blog is to spur your thoughts and comments. Please do not let the spammers cause you not to comment. I know entering the verification words and numbers is a pain in the ass, but I hope you will not let the spammers cause you not to comment.

I still very much look forward to hearing from you.

Jack Scott

Anyone can comment on what I write in this blog. Regretfully, the recent amount of spam in my email account as required that I reinstate the word verification process for comments which I personally hate.

But at the same time I have loosened the comment moderation process so that those of you who have a Google Blogger ID or other recognized blogger ID will no longer need to wait for your comment to be moderated. I'm hoping this will tempt you to take the trouble to comment.

The truth is I want respectful comments both from those who agree with me and those who do not. All I as is that you keep comments to the point, clean and non-threatenting.

I look forward to hearing from each of you.

Jack Scott