I've been sexually active in one form or another, from my earliest memories and throughout my life. As a very young child I discovered it was easy to make my penis harden and swell, and playing with it in that state felt really good.
When I was only 6 years old I stepped things up quite a bit. I got into an "I'll show you mine, if you'll show me yours" situation with the 6 year old girl next door. She eagerly agreed; in fact, in all honesty, I'm not sure it wasn't her idea. I quickly decided I had the better end of the bargain when it came to equipment. There wasn't much to see with hers but I enjoyed checking it out.
That year I also first began having sexual encounters with another guy. That was much more exciting. He had equipment very much like my own and somewhere along the way (he was a year older) he had figured out a boy could do more than just make his penis feel good, he could make his whole body feel good through playing with his penis. I didn't know at that time it was called "orgasm", but when he showed me how to make an orgasm happen, I sure knew it felt good and having felt it, I was hooked. I wanted to feel it as often as possible. As often as possible quickly became every day and sometimes 2 or 3 times a day.
This young friend, I'll call him Chris, was the first to introduce me to the concept of sex as something of an outlier. Of course, I couldn't have and didn't understand the idea of sexual activity and sexuality as an outlier at age 6. But over the coming years I was going to become very familiar with the reality that human sexuality itself is an outlier of profound importance and staggering impacts.
Having introduced me to male/male sexual play, my young friend proceeded to arrange for me to be initiated into a wider group of boys who were all aware of the joys to be had from playing with one's penis. It wasn't much of an initiation really, just my introduction to the group as a willing, very willing, player. These boys ranged from 7 - 10 years old. I already knew all of them since it was a small town and a small school. I just didn't know about "the group."
I soon recognized another outlier. Chris had also introduced me to sucking cock. He taught me how to suck his, and he enjoyed returning the favor. It was a regular part of our play together. However, that kind of play never took place in the group or within the sight of the other boys. In the group there was only nudity, mutual touching and mutual masturbation. Oral sex was never a part of the group play. He and I were outliers in that way too. It didn't matter to me. Sucking Chris' cock felt good. Having him suck mine to orgasm was beyond description.
Through the following years, I began to comprehend more and more that human sexuality, specifically my sexuality and the sexuality of my circle of friends, was an outlier to life as life as it was said life should be. Being only 6 when I was first brought into the group, I was cautioned by the older boys that what we were doing was a secret and it could not be shared with anyone outside the group, especially parents. For whatever reason, I didn't need to be told that. I had been playing with my own cock for a couple of years that I remembered, and I had always made sure not to be discovered at it by my parents or to mention it to them. That just seemed the way it should be for some reason. My parents, in particular my mother, were not uptight about sex, so the feeling I should keep it to myself didn't come from sexual repression on the part of my parents. It just seemed natural that the group and what the group did should not be discussed.
At first I was only aware of the physical outliers concerning sex, the size of my cock and Chris' cock as compared to the other guy's cocks, the fact that Chris and I sucked each other's cocks, but as far as I knew that was something the other boys didn't do. It didn't bother me that it seemed to be only me and Chris that did it. It sure did feel good on both sides of the equation and the more Chris and I did it the better it seemed to feel. I didn't think of the group as an outlier at all. Almost everyone was part of the group. The group was just normal boys being normal boys to me.
But over the next few years, several things happened that gave me new insight into sex and into sex other than the type of sex I was involved with in the group. The biggest source of new information came when my mother became pregnant with my little brother. Being open minded about such things, she used her condition as the opportunity to tell me, in terms I could understand, how pregnancy was achieved and to tell me sex was a normal thing for married men and women to do and while it was a recreational thing, its primary purpose was pregnancy and babies. Frankly I was elated. The importance of her words to me was that sex and all it was to me already plus sexual things I had not yet experienced were a normal part of adult life. I couldn't wait. I looked forward to that day with great anticipation. A whole new world began to open up in my mind though at the time it was really just the glimmer of an outlying world I could barely comprehend.
It was only a short time later that a significant event occurred in the small church which my family and I, as well as all my jacking buddies in the group and their families, attended. Still being just a boy I wasn't told anything directly but I overheard enough of the grownups talking to combine with what I was observing and figure out what had happened. The preacher, who was married, had been caught with the church secretary in a compromising situation in the church office. This resulted in the church secretary quitting her job and leaving town and in the preacher leaving and being replaced with a new preacher. Big words I'd never heard before such as "adultery"and "extramarital sexual relations" were used. Another outlier was duly noted in my mind. Even preachers who were real good about talking about sin and such and warning of the consequences of it, were capable of preaching one thing and carrying on another. They were capable of adultery and extramarital sex.
As I grew older and became a teenager the list of sexual outliers I encountered grew longer and longer. At church we were taught that the things of the world were sinful. And it seemed that in spite of sex being necessary for bringing babies into the world, there was an awful lot of talk about the evils of sex. It was all very confusing to me at some level because frankly, sex sure did feel good. How could it be evil?
When I was 11 or 12 years old, I was aware from personal experience, as well as anecdotal experience that sucking cock was not just something Chris and I did. There were other guys who were interested in that activity. One in particular was a good looking kid who lived a block from me. His mother worked and so he was home alone after school. Many an afternoon, he and I would lay in his bedroom floor and 69 each other. Oral sex might be an outlier, but not near the outlier, I had once thought it to be.
By the time I was 14, I had a driver's license, a job and a car. I was also dating girls and enjoying it. What I was eventually going to identify as my bisexuality, was a real benefit to me during this time of my life. By this time a few other accidental pregnancies had occurred among couples who I knew from school. I was now very much aware such a thing could potentially ruin my life. I was also much aware that while I enjoyed dating girls and making out, orgasms and cuming were best enjoyed with my guy friends. I couldn't get them pregnant. These outliers, it seemed, could be beneficial or not, depending on how one used them.
(The Outliers Part II to Follow)
Anyone can comment on what I write in this blog. Regretfully, the recent amount of spam in my email account as required that I reinstate the word verification process for comments which I personally hate.
But at the same time I have loosened the comment moderation process so that those of you who have a Google Blogger ID or other recognized blogger ID will no longer need to wait for your comment to be moderated. I'm hoping this will tempt you to take the trouble to comment.
I look forward to hearing from each of you.
The truth is I want respectful comments both from those who agree with me and those who do not. All I as is that you keep comments to the point, clean and non-threatenting.
I look forward to hearing from each of you.